This Hamilton-led group’s ornament exchange is helping people with their grief over the holidays

Christmas 2022 was a difficult time for Kelly Sammon as she navigated through the holiday season without her mother, who had passed away unexpectedly on Dec. 20. Feeling lost and unsure of how to move forward, Sammon shared with CBC Hamilton, “I didn’t know where to go, I didn’t know what to do.” Christmas, a time traditionally dedicated to family, felt especially challenging without her mother as a guiding presence.

In an effort to find purpose and support during her grieving process, Sammon, a resident of Hamilton’s Crown Point neighborhood, founded Grieving Gracefully, a virtual support group for individuals who have experienced the loss of a loved one, in May 2023. The group has since grown to include approximately 170 members, both from the initial group and beyond, who are now participating in a holiday card and ornament exchange.

The goal of the holiday exchange, according to Sammon, is to “shine just a little bit of light in somebody’s life” during what can be a particularly challenging time for those who are grieving. Sammon candidly shared, “I started Grieving Gracefully because — I’ll be honest — I needed the support.” Despite the abundance of resources available for grieving individuals, she recognized the need for a community where people could come together and support one another during their grieving process.

Through research on grief and the common feeling of isolation experienced by those who are grieving, Sammon established a platform for individuals to connect, engage in events and book clubs, and participate in a podcast. With approximately 350 members across Canada, the United States, and the United Kingdom, the group has become a source of comfort and companionship for many.

This year’s holiday exchange, which was open to the public, saw participants paired up to exchange cards and ornaments. Some individuals, like Angie Hanson from Valley, Neb., who experienced her own losses, crafted their own ornaments to send to their assigned recipient. Hanson, who runs a greeting card business called Butterflies and Halos, shared that she wanted to offer hope to others who are grieving, especially during the holiday season.

As part of the exchange, Hanson sent out cards and ornaments on behalf of other group members to facilitate cross-border gifting during the Canada Post strike. Reflecting on the impact of these gifts, she remarked, “For years to come, they’re going to be opening up their Christmas tree ornaments, and each year that’s going to bring back a flood of memories.”

Both Sammon and Hanson emphasized the importance of creating new traditions to honor and remember their loved ones during the holiday season. Sammon plans to display her parents’ photos on a window sill and bake cookies with her daughter in memory of her mother. Similarly, Hanson’s Christmas tree has become a memorial for her lost loved ones, bringing her comfort and solace during the holiday season.

In offering advice to those who are grieving during the holidays, Sammon emphasized the importance of giving oneself grace, acknowledging one’s feelings, and allowing space for moments of reflection and self-care. She encouraged individuals to honor their emotions and take breaks when needed, especially during family gatherings or festive events.

As the holiday season unfolds, both Sammon and Hanson continue to find solace in their shared experiences and the support of their community. Through Grieving Gracefully and the holiday exchange, they hope to provide comfort, connection, and light to those who are navigating the complexities of grief during a time traditionally associated with joy and celebration.